Dear Scabby -- Rufus in Redneckville

Dear Scabby:

Did the results in the Super Bowl surprise you?

Sincerely,

Rufus in Redneckville

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Dear Rufus in Redneckville:

Well, we dun had at the house 18 cousins, 12 aunts, nine uncles, 13 nieces, 12 nephews, assorted grammas, grampas, and cousins. Course, since we inbreed, that adds up to purt near eight or nine people total.

Mah perdiction wuz, we's gonna have three drunken brawls, four arrests, six people pukin', and four passed out drunks. Mah hubby predicted five brawls, three arrests, eight people pukin' and only two passed out drunks.

I wuz closer overall, but ah missed on the brawls. Ah fergot cousin Zeb wuz still feudin' with everybody on pa's side, so he got in four brawls all by his own damn self.

Oh, ya mean the winner of the game? Ah ain't gawt no damn clue.

Sincerely,

Scabby